Posted by: ariedan | April 10, 2009

Confessions of a Slightly Devious, But Mostly Annoying Tank

I’ve always wanted to do a sort of guilty pleasures/confessions list, and between not having time to write a decent post before work, and my desire to have a lighter, less serious post, here you go!

1. I’m a barber shop fanatic.

I’ve spent well over 200 gold on changing hairstyles on my warrior, and when I play alts, I change their hair every time I log onto them. My guild loves to tease me for this, especially since it’s the only distinctly female tendency I don’t suppress “in front of the guys.” Whatever, I mean… it’s hair, right? Even guys care about hair. Don’t.. they..?

2. I love my mini-pets.

Which is not to be confused with a mini-pet collector. I like the ones I have, and generally rotate between having my Blizzard bear, showshoe rabbit, and Siamese kitten out.

3. I’m ridiculously vain about how gear looks on my toons.

In fact, I sometimes have a hard time picking up loot that’s a clear upgrade, but considerably uglier. Case-in-point: they’re buffing the currently lackluster Wall of Terror, making it more desirable to use. Logic as a main tank tells me to switch shields when the patch is released. But.. but.. the Barricade of Eternity is so pretty! In the end I always do what’s right, but I always have some sort of internal debate over it.

4. I’ve been known to play Scatman on loop the entire time I was raiding.

I’ve been playing Scatman during raids since the beginning of BC. It makes the BEST raid music! I’m listening to it now, in fact.

5. When I play my mage alt in instances, I might be a little reckless.

Why is it when tanks actually play dps classes, they end up doing all the things they hate dps doing? I AoE too early. When tanks pull too slow for my pace, I ice lance one and frost nova at the tank’s feet. I go invisible it there’s a wipe.. especially if it’s my fault! I don’t back off the threat meter if I hear that telltale “THWOMP!” explosion from Omen, thinking, “Meh.. I’ve always got Iceblock!” I’m everything I hate, and I’m your worst nightmare, tanks. You better hope I don’t get this mage to 80!

6. I sometimes let the melee die on purpose during trash.

If someone pulls off me, believe me, I know it. I’m tabbing enough, and I’ve got enough mods to tell me when I’ve lost aggro on something, besides. Normally, I’m lightening-fast at taunting. But.. sometimes I wait until the mob has killed the person who pulled before taunting back. I’m devious, aren’t I? Makes me feel empowered! /flex

7. I’m by no means a trade troll, but I’m a general channel troll.

Random level two alt, in some random low level zone. Somebody says something stupid. You better believe I’m the first person to respond with something usually snarky and/or sarcastic. The best part of it, though, is that the people are usually too dumb to catch I’ve insulted them. I remember once rolling an alt with my boyfriend, and him looking at me all shocked saying, “You’re mean!” I don’t know why I usually do this on alts. The obvious suspected reason is that I don’t want to look bad on my main, and that’s far from true. I troll on my main on the forums, and have absolutely no respect for people who can’t voice their opinions on their mains. I’m horribly, brutally honest regardless of what character I’m on, believe me. No, the reason is I’m rarely in general on my main, and that’s the toasted toad’s truth! Besides, the general chat in 80 zones is usually raiding and/or pvp related. My preference is general stupidity, instead of flaming e-penis wars.

8. I once tried bribing a hunter to misdirect a healer*.

I wish I had a close hunter friend so I can do this all the time. There is nothing funnier than a hunter being bribed to misdirect healers*. I can’t explain why it’s funny, it just is.

*Please note, healer can be replaced by warlocks. Warlocks are funny when they die, too! (sorry, warlocks! *ducks rotten tomatoes*) And on the note of warlocks, I like to tease the warlocks in my guild by playing vigilance roulette before a boss fight. Last person I put it on before we go in, gets it for the fight. I’m mean to our warlocks, but it’s a lovable cruelty!

9. I desperately want to play a shaman at times.

Not because I enjoy the class, but because I want to screw with people and give them water walking right when they’re jumping into water. Lurker is a fantastic example. Since I can’t, I try to bribe my boyfriend, who plays an enhance shaman, to do it. The flip-side is when the guild bribes him to do it to me, and they all laugh when the tables turn. Sad face!

10. I hate gnomes.

This one isn’t so much of a guilty please as it is just a fact. I don’t know why, but I really, really, really hate gnomes. Their squeaky little voices, their appearance.. I can’t quite put my finger on it (could that be a pun?), but something about gnomes just drives me up a wall.

So, what’re your guilty pleasures/dirty secrets? We all have some! Let’s hear ‘em.


Responses

  1. 1.*Jaw Drops* You hate Gnomes!?! *Points to his
    armory page*

    2. I too have been known to play Scatman O_o

    3. I collect mini-pets. I have over 60

    4. I have misdirected healers on my Hunter =(

    More like dirty little secrets but oh well!

    • Oh, you’re a gnome?! *slowly backs away*

      Also, confirmation that Scatman is indeed the best raiding song ever. *e-high-five*

  2. I take great pleasure in Misdirecting to people I hate. True story, I misdirected Thrym onto a NElf Huntard once. Fun times.

    • Misdirecting another hunter? Doesn’t that like violate some serious hunter rule? :P

  3. Hurray to 3! Loot for looks, that’s my basic principle. Going to battleground in a wedding dress? Yep I have done that. Healing heroics in season 2 pvp gear cuz it looks awesome? Yep I have done that also. Personally I think a good looking toon just makes you enjoy the game much better than an ugly one. But of course you only do this when you are confident that you are over geared for encounters.

    and no worries you are not the only one addicted to the barber shop. gg to blizzard for putting up a gold sink. -_-”

  4. XD

    My sister-in-law changes her hair constantly too. I take particular pride in not having the Shave and a Haircut achievement. I tell everyone it’s because “I did it right in the creation screen” and that’s partly true. I took a lot of time to put my characters together and none of the new hairs fit them.

    1-3 & 6 made me smile in particular.

  5. this is great, thanks

  6. This is a fantastic blog. Fantastic.

  7. The best thing about Gnomes is when they die, they do that little flip over and croak thing. You could couple your love of misdirecting to random people with your hatred of Gnomes for good times. :D

    • Oh, you’re so right! So gnomes are good for something.. killing. And maybe sandwiches. Do you think they’d taste good BBQ’d?

  8. Still smilin’ at this one :D

    hmmmm…

    I play Blizkrieg Bop over and over and over again in instances. It goes well with the thunderclaps which i over spam.

    I’m a barber shop fanatic, too. sigh. Need. More. Hairstyles. Patch 3.2 should be all hair.

    I do NOT /gigle think misdirecting to a healer is /giggle funny. I /giggle DO NOT. Not Fun/giggle nee!

    I never ever reply. but read General and Trade because I like the snarky comments.

    -Fri

  9. My guilty pleasures?

    You mean…uh…besides the obvious? :-D

  10. 1. – Clicking off the misdirect buff and watching the hunter die.

    2. – Tanking with cleave…

    • “1. – Clicking off the misdirect buff and watching the hunter die.”
      Oh, that’s priceless! I’m adding that to the back of my memory for later usage.

  11. I’ve been known to be a snarky general chat troll on occassion… for those particularly /facepalm questions.

    But I do need to throw some rotten tomatoes at you, because warlocks do not need to die! /glare

    Speaking of water walking… DK frost step can lead to some fun. If you decide to drop down the water holes after clearing UK… toss frost step on someone as they plummet and they will die from the icy impact.

  12. When I played my holy paladin, I used to DI tanks midway through tough boss fights.

    I play my DK in UK specifically to let my best friends in my guild go splat. ^_^ They’ve gotten wise to me, though, and won’t leave the instance unless I’m already gone or they’re hearthing.

    Guess I’ll have to come up with something new. :D

  13. #3 – This is me also. I will generally wear a slight downgrade that looks better on farm content. Prolly not good to tell my GL this but there it is=)

    #5 – HAHA. I think anyone who plays anything other than dps as main spec is guilty of this….the reason being, it is payback. Somewhere somehow inside my mind it makes me feel a little better knowing I can do it to others.

    As to number 6 – while you are busy not taunting offa the dps who pulled I am often busy whistling and looking the other way with the heals=) Glad to know I have a quiet supporter in this=)

    #8 – One of my favorite past times in my old guild, having a complicit hunter does help a lot with this

    And one of my own – I still have my t6 gear sitting in my bank because I cannot bear to part with it. Catch me late at night in darnassus to see a t6 holy pally in all her glory!

    • I’ll pull out my t6 and we can chill at one of the banks, deal? I still need my chest piece, though… I seriously never got it. :(

  14. My response >>> http://shyatwow.blogspot.com/2009/04/confessions-of-priest.html

    Nice post ^_^

  15. 8. Oh, be very, very careful with this. We healers can be a fussy lot and we might oh, accidentally forget to heal you next time. Accidentally ;)

    9. I love shamans. Well, I love all space goats, but I always have a blast (pun?) when I play my shaman. Mine’s elemental, because I’m a caster at heart, but I love shamans and I love having them in my party.

    10. Gnomes don’t bother me. Male humans, on the other hand, especially ones with blood elf haircuts…

  16. “Clicking off the misdirect buff and watching the hunter die. ”

    Husband = Hunter. I hope he’s not reading this so it doesn’t spoil all the fun!


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